TODAY

Two years ago my sweet Nana left us....I'm sitting in the waiting room at Baptist while my dad has yet another hip surgery and I'm looking across the room at the exact chair that my Nana sat in while he was in his last surgery over 2 years ago. She had just lost her only daugther, my mother, 3 months earlier, and she wasn't in the greatest health herself and yet she drove to Nashville and sat through her son-in-law's surgery, just to be here for him. She made us laugh the whole time with her crazy sayings and saying whatever she was thinking (no filter!) That's how she was.....so kind and loving, fun, sweet, and a tad on the crazy side (that was the Cuban in her!) I miss her terribly....and some days I feel bad for feeling bad but I'm trying to come to terms with the fact that even though she's been gone two years and my mother has been gone three, it's still ok to grieve. My sister is reading a book and she quoted me something from it that really pierced me.....

"If you've been marked by what might have been, you don't forget. You know the day, the years. You know when the baby would have been born. You know exactly what anniversary you'd be celebrating, if the wedding had happened. You know exactly how old she'd be right now, if she were still alive. You'll never forget the last time you saw your child, or the last time cancer was a word about someone else's life, or the day that changed absolutely everything. It makes the calendar feel like a minefield, like you're constantly tiptoeing over explosions of grief until one day you hit one, shattered by waht might have been. On most days, for me, it's al right. We'll have another baby someday. I hope we do. But for today, for a minute, it's not alright. I understand that God is sovereign, that bodies are fragile and fallible. I understand that grief mellows over time, and that guarantees aren't part of human life, as much as we'd like them to be. But on this day, looking out at the harsh white sky of a Chicago winter, I'm crying just a little for what might have been......Life will keep moving, exactly as it should. No one might ever notice January 31, and what it means for me. But I'll always know.
I don't know what date it is for you- what broke apart on that day, what was lost, what memories are pinned forever to that day on that calendar. But I hope that.....hold yourself open and tender to the memories for just a moment. As one who grieves today, I grieve with you, for whatever you've lost, too, for what might have been." Shauna Niequist, from the book Bittersweet

A good reminder that is ok to grieve and realize that this world will not last.....our citizenship is somewhere else. I loved the sermon from my pastor, Chad, yesterday, where he talked about what the reality of the world is.....and the glimpse of hope that God gives us every once in awhile because she loves us....check out the sermon if you can!!! (gcomchurch.com)

Grace Driven Effort

Grave-Drive Effort June 6 sermon

http://denton.thevillagechurch.net/sermons

Love me some Matt Chandler....check out this sermon!!

random

http://www.break.com/break-best-videos/toyota-sienna---swagger-wagon.html

CSL!!!!!!!

Cross Street Live starts up again tomorrow.....It's an amazing hour of worship, fun, and, crazy characters, and videos all for kids and parents to enjoy together!!! It's not just a GCC thing.....anyone from the community is invited!! Lunch is at 12:45 PM at Rossview High ($2 donation) and the show starts at 1:30 sharp!!! For more info, check out gcomchurch.com. This is a great way for you to spend time with your child having fun and also learning something valuable, that will stick with them!! Don't miss it!!!

gcomchurch.com
gcomkids.com

months of old

From Morning and Evening (Charles H. Spurgeon) on August 11th:

“Oh, that I were as in the months of old.” Job 29:2


Many Christians are able to view the past with pleasure but regard the present with dissatisfaction. They look back upon the days that they have spent in communing with the Lord as being the sweetest and the best they have ever known; but as to the present, it is as if they were smothered by a heavy blanket of gloom and dreariness. Once they lived near Jesus, but now they feel that they have wandered from Him, and they say, “Oh, that I were as in the months of old.” They complain that they have lost their evidences, or that they no longer have peace of mind, or that they have no enjoyment in the means of grace, or that their conscience is hardened, or that they are no longer as zealous for God's glory as they once were. The causes of this mournful state of things are many. It may arise through a comparative neglect of prayer, for neglected closet is the beginning of all spiritual decline. Or it may be the result of idolatry. The heart has been occupied with something else, more than with God; the affections have been set on things of earth instead of the things of heaven. A jealous God will not be content with a divided heart; He must be loved first and best. He will withdraw the sunshine of His presence from a cold, wandering heart. Or the cause may be found in self-confidence and self-righteousness. Pride is busy in the heart, and self is exalted instead of lying low a the foot of the cross. Christian, if you are not now as you “were...in the months of old,” do not be content to simply wish for a return of your former happiness, but go at once to seek your Master and tell Him your sad state. Ask His grace and strength to enable you to walk more closely with Him; humble yourself before Him, and He will lift you up and allow you once more to enjoy the light of His countenance. Do not sit down to sigh and lament; while the beloved Physician lives there is hope; there is a certainty of recovery even for the worst cases.

Making Strides!!!!!!!

Hey it's that time of year again....I have a team for the Making Strides walk for Breast Cancer. So simple...you just have to join my team, and walk. On the site, there are ways to help you get donations but no matter if you get $5 or $200, you can still walk and raise awareness for this cause! It's so much fun too!! Here's the website and you can go to my page to sign up....it's under Team Watts (creative I know) Thanks!!!!!!!

http://main.acsevents.org/site/TR?pg=entry&fr_id=28123

you never realize.....

Sunday I had two cool situations happen that reminded me of the importance of what one choice, one word, one serving heart can do and what a difference it makes. The first one was just me rushing in to hear the service and a man stopped me, who I know just from GCC and his grandchildren come to Grace Acres. He just out of the blue said to me, I bet no one ever tells you thank you for all your hard work. It doesn't go unnoticed and it's appreciated. Thank you.
What a simple statement but good grief it made my whole day!! I'm passionate about preschoolers learning about who God is and how to live a Godly live at an early age, and not for anything of me, but I do work hard and long to help make it happen. It's all of the Lord, nothing good in me! But to hear that just affirmed in me that God's ministry is affecting people, and not going unnoticed. I needed to hear that, and I know he didnt know what that meant to me.
Other thing is a volunteer that took over during a service hour so I could go to service. He kept saying I really didn't do anything but he did. It gave me an hour to break away from my to do list and all that was spinning in my mind and just worship and let God work in my heart. It was HUGE for me....yet again these people don't think they did anything special but for me it was a big deal.
Just reminds me that I have to be in the Spirit daily and listening to what He is asking me to do,and never belittle or think it's dumb or insignificant to encourage someone, serve someone, send an email, note, text....we may never see the effects but God knows and that person knows....we don't have to. That's the importance of letting the Spirit guide us even in the daily walk of life.

get on with it

I went to a memorial service yesterday....to be totally honest, I of course wasn't a huge fan of them before, who is?....But since my mom and grandmother passed, I absolutely loathe them. But I went, partly because I wanted to honor and celebrate the life of a Godly, wonderful woman, and also because each time I go to a funeral it's like a huge slap to my face that I am here for a short time and for ONE purpose....NOTHING else, and I mean NOTHING else, matters.
It was another great reminder of me to refocus where I'm going with my life....what I need to cut out, and how much more of God I need in my everyday life. This is not our home....as it says in the Bible, our citizenship is in Heaven.
Reminds me of a quote I saw on someone's FB page awhile back....it said something like this, The sooner we die, the sooner we can get on with it. I think about that quote a lot. Very true.....now I just need to live like it's true.
What things in your life do you need to cut out because they just don't matter? Are you living life with no regrets, enjoying what God has given you, taking every chance to serve Him and others, and ignoring those things that just don't matter?.......

Not sure.....

Not sure what to call this post....it's been kind of a challenging couple of months for me. For some reason, I've just been in an emotional funk (yes, that's a professional term/diagnosis) You know when you go through those times of just feeling blah and the most frustrating part is you don't know why....family is healthy, job is good, friends are a blessing. So what's the problem? I think that there isn't always rhyme or reason to why we feel the way we do and it has reminded me even more to trust God and NOT my emotions and my feelings each day. I've spent a lot of this morning reflecting over the past few months and thinking about how God has continued to bless me, love on me, and show Himself to me.....here are just a few shots of how He continues to give and give into my life and even though my emotions sometimes aren't on the same page, my desire is to want to give and give more to Him and for His Name. He is good and He IS to be trusted, in the ups and downs.

Headed out to the Drive conference tomorrow....excited to get away for a couple days and I'm excited to see North Point, can't believe I've never been there. I always have mixed feelings because I hate leaving my sweet pea...but I know her and Papaw will be having way too much fun and be eating way too much sugar!!

I still feel sick but got some meds yesterday and praying that will help me to feel better and be able to focus this week. Today was a great day at Grace....even with all the rain, it was great to see the people that did come out, the music was amazing, and Chad was RIGHT on, as usual. He spoke a true word from the Lord and it is so applicable to my life. Am so thankful for him and Ron's obedience to preach the Word and share wisdom so I, and we, can grow in our faith and learn more about who God is and how we need to live our lives.

God is really teaching me right now about His faithfulness....over and over again I keep hearing that and in turn I am learning to trust Him more and worry less. I am also learning about whole-hearted obedience, not just giving God a few things but everything, even the things that are the hardest to turn over to Him. Everytime I do though, something amazing happens...it's such a freedom. If we could only quit being so stubborn, and realize that God knows more and IS more and if we will just LET GO of everything we think is valuable and good and ours, we can have so much more. It's a great time in my life and I love what He is teaching me and pray that I'll continue to be moldable.

Yesterday was really hard....two funerals in one day. I hate funerals.....Mom and Nana's deaths start reeling in my mind...all the memories from when I first heard the news up until I left their grave sites. I usually try to keep those memories in the back of my mind as much as possible. It was a good reminder though for me to not waste a day, love others, encourage, take risks, serve, seek Him, and focus....He's all that matters in the end. ALL. the one and ONLY thing. Good reminder but still a hard day.....thankful for good friends that encouraged me through it and were there for me to talk to. Seems like after 2 1/2 years I wouldn't miss my mom so much but it's just not that way. Grief is so complex and diverse. But in the end, I'm thankful for hope....what would I do without Jesus? Wow, I am blessed. Hope everyone has a great week and takes time out to spend with the One that matters.

who wants peace??

wow, this is a great sermon about getting peace in our lives.....we ALL need it and want it....some of my favorite quotes from this....

When I have a puny pursuit of God, a half-hearted followship of Jesus Christ, it's always related to the fact that I have a puny vision of what God wants to do in my life.

The enemy...he wants to diminish the greatness of God and the life that is found in Him. The evil one constantly wants us to think we can create for ourselves a better life than God can.

You want God's good stuff, but you won't give up your stuff.

http://www.marinersmedia.org/podmedia/audiopod/20081228-marinerschurch-podcast.m4a

love this thought....thankful that God has given me a heart to serve, it's nothing of me...as it says in the Bible, everything good comes from HIM!! And He has placed a deserve in me that burns to serve and love. great post on how we all should be reaching out, serving, loving, helping....it's what He desires for us to do. If we don't have love, we have nothing.....1 Corin. 13

ttp://www.ragamuffinsoul.com/2010/04/help-im-locked-in-my-church-and-cant-get-out/?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=Feed%3A+RagamuffinSoul+%28Ragamuffin+Soul%29&utm_content=Google+Feedfetcher

Rivers & Spires

Had a great weekend at R&S!!!

I asked, and He answered

I was having somewhat of a down day yesterday and feeling some insecurities about my relationship with the Lord. I was driving to work after I dropped KJ off, and I was just praying and pleading with God to show Himself to me and encourage me that I am still His child. I was feeling such doubt that after all my failures and mistakes does He still REALLY love me and desire a relationship with me? My knowledge of His Word and my experiences in the past of course said yes but you know those times when you have those doubts and just wonder if He really is who He says He is. I went through the day as normal and part of the day was so busy that I didn't even remember what I had prayed for.

Then last night I went to community group and we watched a video about being a disciple of Jesus and how He chose His disciples and believed in a 'ragamuffin' group and how they ended up changing the world for Christ. He talked about how Jesus believes in us and wants us to follow Him. I wish I could put the video on here so you could hear what he said but it touched me and I realized that was what I needed to hear from the Lord. Then today as I was working I was listening to one of Ron's sermons, Adoption, and wow, it was exactly what I needed to hear. This is such a reminder to me that God does care about us, HE cares about our doubts and fears (even when they don't make sense or even when He's told us over and over again How much He loves us), and He answered my prayer. I knew He would because He always does.....and it's usually not like I would think. It's never an audible voice, of course, but it's something so strong and so powerful and so perfect for what I am needing that I know it can ONLY be Him.

I needed that reminder that I am always going to be His....He is always going to be my Father. And it gives me more of a passion to want to serve Him and do everything I can to show people who He really is. Here's the link to the adoption sermon. It's not long, it's so powerful, and if you haven't heard it, just take a few minutes and let God speak to you..

http://www.gcomchurch.com/podcast/

Adoption sermon on 04/11

LIFE

I hear story after story of people struggling, going through heartache, pain, disease, suffering.....it's a messy world. Our citizenship is not here on this earth. But the weird thing for me is the more stories I hear, the more I want to get on my knees, ask forgiveness for wasting ONE minute of being angry over something petty, feeling self-pity, being lazy, letting someone steal my joy, being a jerk to someone just because I'm having a bad day.......I mean, what am I doing here? The world is suffering and I'm here for one purpose: TO BRING GLORY TO HIS NAME.

I don't want to waste another minute where I am not serving Jesus and pointing everyone to Him. I mean He's the only REAL answer anyway, so why am I wasting what little breath I have on this life? Get it together, Trina......realize what is important and the only reason I am given another day to leave. I'm serving the One that I'm so undeserved to even serve. Amazing.....

"Is my master ambition to please Him and be acceptable to Him, or is it something less, no matter how noble?" O. Chambers

"Have I entered into the glorious privilege of being crucified with Christ until all that is left is the life of Christ in my flesh and blood?" O. Chambers

...."Praise be to you, O Lord, God of our father Israel, from everlasting to everlasting. Yours, O Lord, is the greatness and the power and the glory and the majesty and the splendor, for everything in heaven and earth is yours. Yours, O Lord, is the kingdom; you are exalted as head over all. Wealth and honor come from you; you are the ruler of all things. In your hands are strength and power to exalt and give strength to all. Now, our God, we give you thanks, and praise your glorious name." 1 Chronicles 29: 10-13

Test Drive

God is doing some amazing, fun, and exciting things in Grace Acres right now and I am so looking forward to sharing that with other people in our church!!! This Sunday we are having Test Drive which will allow people the opportunity to check out what's going on in Grace Acres, observe, and eventually serve......we are growing so fast and it's so cool to watch! We need check in volunteers, teachers, helpers, floaters, storytellers, overseers, greeters, the list goes on!!!! If you go to GCC and haven't found a place to plug in yet, check it out this Sunday!!

great truths shared with me

http://www.truewoman.com/?id=941

Someone sent me this and I thought it was so amazing and so true!!!! Things I want to focus and work on in my life....let's believe the truths in His Word and not of this world!!!

cool post

http://www.leadingsmart.com/2010/04/it-was-a-good-friday.html

Here's a cool post that reminds me of what a blessing it is to serve on a team that God has put together....I just happen to be blessed to be on the GCC team and it's humbling, a blast, and God blesses me through it everyday....

Rivers & Spires

I love going down to Rivers & Spires...running into people I haven't seen in awhile, eating food that is really bad for you:)....and KJ and I always have a blast at the games. One of the other cool things about it is that I volunteer every year in the Grace area and it doesn't even feel like volunteering because it's a lot of fun. Our community group is doing it together this year which is a fun way to spend time together but also to serve!! We still need volunteers so if you want to sign up call us at GCC or go online at gcomchurch.com. It's really easy to sign up! Looking forward to a great weekend!!!!

Easter

Been awhile since I've really updated my blog....so much goin on and it's been a whirlwind some weeks but always good. Even through the hard days, God has been so good to me and I continually can not understand or fathom His goodness which is so HUGE when I am SO undeserving.....as David said....."How great is your goodness, which you have stored up for those who fear you, which you bestow in the sight of men on those who take refuge in you....." And then later on he goes on to say "In my alarm I said, "I am cut off from your sight!" Yet you heard my cry for mercy when I called to you for help." Psalm 31: 19, 22

I can relate to David....I get stressed out, let fear overcome me, worry, doubt, and just the crazy emotions of life....and then I feel God is so far away. But He's NOT. If we call on Him, sometimes we have to cry out to Him, He will answer and He will be there for us no matter what. He extends mercy and grace in my life beyond what I have ever known and I can't give Him enough praise and honor for what He has done and is doing in my life. I am at the point where I want every moment to count....everything I do to point to Him. He is worth it!

So if you're in a pit, confused about how you feel about God, or just kind of in that mundane, 'blah' stage of life, open His Word, read about the amazing things He has done and know that He is still that God today and can and will get you through whatever you are going through. He will be your comforter, friend, strength, rest, and unconditional lover when no one else on the face of this earth can be any of that to you. Praise to be HIM ALONE....just because HE IS!

http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/6005/1983/1600/Disney%27s%20Desperate%20Housewives.0.jpg

good series

If you're looking for a good sermon series to check out, try Matt Chandler's on Colossians....great stuff!! thevillage.net (sermon archives)

Keep praying for him and his family as he continues to battle cancer! May God be glorified!!!!!!

What Goes On Behind the Scenes.....

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6gY1UajxnSQ

my heart's desire...what can we do??

http://www.fellowshipradio.org/

Shane Claiborne sermon.....we may not all can travel to other countries or end up in jail for serving Him, but we can ALL do something!!!

UP

I think Up is one of the best love stories...I don't care if it IS a movie for kids. I never get tired of watching it:)

PRAYIN'

So, I don't really do New Year resolutions but something I'm working on getting better at this year is praying for other people. I love doing it, I just don't do it enough. I feel like we underestimate the power there is in goin to God on behalf of someone and really supporting them in that way. The enemy doesn't want us to support and encourage each other and help protect each other....there is a lot of power in that and we just let it sit everyday. For me, I hope I can be more consistent about it and I look forward to seeing how God will answer prayers in people's lives and getting to share in that.
SO....can you help me with this? Send me a prayer request or burden you have for yourself or someone close to you...and then keep me updated on how God is working in your life with that prayer request. Just comment, FB me, or email me (katrinavw@gmail.com)
Some of the things I'm praying for in my life is learning more about being controlled by the Holy Spirit, my daughter's growth spiritually and mentally, and what God has for me this Spring! (new volunteer opportunities, school, etc.) I'm sure I'll be updating you on what God does and how He answers these things in my life....1 Cor. 2:9
THANKS!!!!!

some of my fav pics of my girl this year

God's gift to me

Today sucs. It's just been one of those days. Haven't had one in awhile. Lots of obstacles at work. Lots of stuff goin on in my head personally. And then just those little annoying things where everything is going wrong...I spill or break everything I touch. I can't get anything to work. My daughter is in a bad mood...just one of those days. I want to be on an island alone, away from everyone and everything. But it doesn't work that way. So I just endure it, hoping tomorrow will be better........and then I look up from the couch tonight and here comes my girl, dressed like Cinderella, asking me to help her button her dress. Then she sits in my lap and we watch a Barbie movie and make fun of the dancing dogs. And that, my friends, is God's gentle reminder to me that I'm always goin to have those days on earth, I should long for Heaven ('our citizenship is in Heaven'), but also because of His kindness and grace, He has given me a gift (called KJ) that can make me smile everyday, no matter what is going on in my life. She never fails to make me happy, make me laugh, and give me hope even in my worst day, and my worst moods. He didn't have to bring her to me but He did. And that's what makes Him so amazing.