I was really having a pity party this morning for myself....some things happened last night that really had me struggling emotionally and mentally, and I just shut down after KJ went to bed and went to bed myself. I woke up not feeling much better but finding myself forced to get up, get KJ ready for pajama day at school, get ready for work, and over to babysit for a friend before work. After I dropped KJ off, I was fighting back tears and the urge to drive back home and get back in the bed, and throw my cell phone and laptop under the bed.....but I decided to try a different tactic and instead of feeding the flesh and continuing to feel sorry for myself, to starve the flesh and feed the Spirit. So I had a one-on-one with God asking Him to just be everything for me today, to satisfy the huge hole in my heart, and to be my Comforter, Best Friend, and Lover. I love the song You're All I Need but this was the moment where I needed to believe it.
My Bible study last night was about having the courage to see His promises fulfilled, and I prayed that He would give me patience and hope to wait, and to keep growing, changing, and serving during that in between time. So anyway, I had some real and honest time with God, telling Him I felt pitiful, I am pitiful, blah, blah, and I just needed Him to turn my thoughts and heart around. Within fifteen minutes, something happened that I really needed to make my day easier, and my thoughts just began turning to His blessings and how He wants to use me today, to not waste THIS day.....just by coming before Him even when I didn't feel like it, He turned my thoughts from me, to Him and His glory. I've heard someone say before, You can't be pitiful and powerful. To me, that means if I'm focused on me, then I can't allow the Holy Spirit to work His power in my life.
I encourage you today that if you are stressed, frustrated, depressed, or angry, turn to God, even if you don't feel like it. Don't trust your feelings. Trust Him. Don't just believe in Him, but believe HIM. He will do what He says He will do. He will fulfill His promises in your life. Have courage to watch and see Him come through for you because He will, in the little things and the huge things.
"Who is like you, a people saved by the Lord? He is the shield that protects you, the sword you boast in. Your enemies will cringe before you, and you will tread on their backs." Deut. 33:29
"O Sovereign Lord, you are God! Your words are trustworthy, and you have promised good things to your servant. Now be pleased to bless the house of your servant, that it may continue forever in your sight; for you, O Sovereign Lord, have spoken, and with your blessing the house of your servant will be blessed forever." 2 Samuel 7: 28-29